Our Funny English Language

 

Have you ever thought how difficult it must be to learn English?

This concept came to the forefront of my thinking when I started learning Arabic a few years back. At about that same time, Gage was learning how to truly read – not just recognize words. It was then that the complexity of our language took root in my mind as I observed him trudging such intricacies as homographs and homophones.

Take for instance these two examples. {In their original form, they are rather lengthy so I trimmed them up a bit.}

We must polish the Polish furniture.
He could lead if he would get the lead out.
The soldier decided to desert in the desert.
When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
The bandage was wound around the wound.
The buck does funny things when the does are present.
The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
After a number of injections my jaw got number.
Upon seeing the tear in my clothes I shed a tear.

Dearest creature in creation,

Study English pronunciation.

I will teach you in my verse

Sounds like corpse, corps, horse, and worse.

Just compare heart, beard, and heard,

Dies and diet, lord and word,

Sword and sward, retain and Britain.

(Mind the latter, how it’s written.)

You must be careful how you speak:

Say break and steak, but bleak and streak;

Billet does not rhyme with ballet,

Bouquet, wallet, mallet, chalet.

Blood and flood are not like food,

Nor is mould like should and would.

Shoes, goes, does. Now first say finger,

And then singer, ginger, linger,

Won’t it make you lose your wits,

Writing groats and saying grits?

Finally, which rhymes with enough,

Though, through, plough, or dough, or cough?

Hiccough has the sound of cup.

My advice is to give up!!!

And with that, I am content to intimate the content of this message to you my intimate friends. {grin}

 

Hugs!

Thank you, Amy, for the latter poem!

Images above found here and here